A Good Day

Today has been a good day. It's warm!!! I went riding with my friends and jumping and galloping and we all just felt good, "bustin' loose" is the word that comes to mind. My chestnut horse, Red, is awesome.

My son is coming to dinner with his girlfriend. We are going to cook . I love my grown up kids , they are such cool people. Will and I talked a bit ago, he was in DC at a formal fraternity event. Said he had a great time. Mike and I were also in town last night, went to see the Opera!! First time ever and we choose the Russian Opera performance of War and Peace. It was a spectacle, at least 200 performers, telling the story of Napoleon invading Russia ( well that is a bit simplified , but you get the idea!) The singing was amazing and we didn't even understand a word of it, all in Russian. It was a trip.

I am now watching basketball and thanks to my wonderful son I understand it! I even can tell when someone makes an amazing play and that is cool. An awesome athlete is just a pleasure to watch, that's why I love football, basketball and, of course, Thoroughbred horses!!

My mare is still here. She nickers at me in the morning and hobbles outside to be in the sun. We are fighting and hoping. The other mare should foal any day now, we are foal watching at night, thought if we missed the birth last night we would call the foal Tolstoy! But she is also waiting and watching. I wonder if mares wonder about their impending offspring?

Mike's horse, Bob, is sleeping in the hay pile in his muddy field. So cute.

Early March walk in the woods

Today I walked in my woods. Bella, my Schnoodle came and the 6 month old Lab, Leo. Winter is loosening its hold, there is still snow , but there is more water and mud. I can almost hear the spring peepers. I know they are under the mud just waiting for a warmer day. It is supposed to hit high 50's this weekend and the cherry blossoms will be out in about 3 weeks. I walked my riding paths to pick up after the snows. To move downed trees and replace logs on my jumps in the woods. The puppies are tired tonight, they ran hard. Leo was reluctant to jump the big stream, which you can't actually jump, so he had to figure out a cold plunge. I finally just pulled him in after I tired of the pitiful whines on the bank. He got over it.

One of the casualties of the deep snow was the lowest, third "strip" of "tape" on my electric tape fence. I use a neighbour's field , who doesn't want permanent fencing, so I have used to great success white electric "tape". The snow just buried the bottom strip and the tape came away from all the holders. I walked the fence line and replaced all these little white "holders", jerking every time the electric current caught me! It was hard and my fingers were cold but it was satisfying to fix it myself. It was about 4:30 and the sun was just starting to go down and it was really lovely out. The fields have just a hint of what they will be in another month.

My mare is still holding on but it is not great. She is not improving on the antibiotics like I had hoped. The leg is still swollen and she so lame. I am heartbroken and wish it wasn't happening.

Marching on..

March is bringing milder weather, finally. The snowdrifts and snow piles are melting, the bare ground patches are spreading into almost a whole field. The horses are desperately searching for the single blades of grass that survived ice, mud and hooves sliding across them. Even Chessie, my lame, sick, emaciated mare is trying to find grass. She is still alive, we switched antibiotics to doxycycline, which she can stay on longer, but she is so thin and limping and pitiful. Every time the vet and I talk about realities of recovery, whether this is lymphoma or a chronic infection that we can't find, she lifts her head , looks straight at me and I see her fighting. It is heartbreaking . But I will fight as long as she can.

Yesterday was the ten anniversary of my brother's death. I still miss him terribly and can't believe it has been ten years. Still grieve for him quietly and wish my kids had known him longer and that my husband had met him. I remember the day he died I was hunting and my horse spooked because I had shot over his ear, at an errant puppy running riot. He bucked so hard I broke three fingers that got caught in my gun. A member of the field came up and soothed him while I regrouped. I have always thought it was the pain of grief and helplessness in the face of my brother's cancer that manifested itself in that injury, on that day.

Windy,windy

The wind is unbelievable this morning-gusts to 60. I am so glad that we dodged the blizzard bullet this time, tho I feel badly for the folks in PA and NY. Have definitely had enough snow to last a lifetime. I am checking on "sick"mare, hoping she is still holding her own. The antibiotic seems to be giving her some advantage but we are not out of the woods yet, as my vet says. But she is good enough that I am going to skip town and make the basketball tournament. It is at least 5 hrs to Roanoke ,so I want to be gone by noon. I was so disgusted with cleaning stalls of snowbound horses that I finally threw them all out in back field and they went crazy ,running around. I did leave the older boys out in their big paddock and I'm sure they rode out the wind in their run-in. I relented when the winds started to blow and brought the mares and babies in last night , but they are going out today! The mares who are foaling in soon are up by the barn and they will come in with Chessie , the sick one. So, my long -suffering husband only has a few stalls to do hopefully. And hopefully he does not have to foal anybody!! I just looked outside and thought I saw some new bare ground patches!! Then , I looked closer and realized I was looking at roof shingles!! Yikes, they have blown off the roof- not good. Wish me luck driving down Rt 81 in this wind, think I'll take the truck, the Mini might become airborne!!

Hopeful

My mare is still alive. It has been a roller-coaster and the hardest part is not really knowing what is wrong. We were pretty sure it was cancer because of the chronic loss of weight and condition while eating and everything else seeming normal, but she has rallied after being as close to death as I have ever seen, since we tried the stronger antibiotic. I have never seen an infection cause this condition without obvious high fever etc but everyday I am hopeful she is still standing and when I go out to barn the last two days , she is relaxed and eating. Still extremely thin but nickering to the boys beside her. In fact, I think she is in season and teasing them. She actually busted two fence rails ( or the boys did) and went into the boys paddock. She had to deal with my big warmblood, who is the biggest bully around, so that was amazing.

I am about to go out this morning and I am hopeful she is still rallying. I did not give her "Bute" last night. So we shall see if the antibiotic is still helping.

More snow is threatening, high winds are coming, the paddocks are full of mud if not still covered in snow and all I really want is SPRING. I want healthy foals , and healed horse and some sunshine! I need to go to Roanoke to watch my son's basketball tournament, but I have a foal coming, and two yearlings that are difficult (playful) for others to lead and my mare is ill- so do I go or not? It will depend on the storm and how much melts . If I can put the mares back out in the big paddocks I may try to get to see the games! Think SUN, think WARM.

,

Brand new day

My mare is still alive. She rallied after we gave her a much stronger antibiotic. From not being able to stand, she was up and eating yesterday morning. I shall see in a minute when I go out to feed if it is still working miracles. Fingers crossed. The vet said there was a chance it is a chronic infection, but he is still very concerned about cancer. She 's a fighter so all I can do is help her fight.

It can always get worse...

Just when you think nothing else will go wrong, something does! My "lame " horse is doing very bad. We're afraid it is cancer, as we have ruled just about everything else out. The vet took blood and fecal and said there is no sign of organ failure- but she is sure failing. It is heartbreaking- this business can really hurt sometimes. This was my mare that won the Yearling TB Championship two years ago and now she is dying. I am the chairwoman of our annual Hunt Ball and have to go tonight while all this is going on. Even though I probably can't do anything else to help her I feel awful. She is still eating , so there is a small chance. We are giving her strong antibiotics and painkillers , so .... This mare has her picture on a Legends feed bag right now too. Go figure.

Wishing I could be at Will's last season game tonight, but have to be elsewhere as mentioned. It 's hard to be cheery today.